


Things That Need Saying

by blueboxesandtrafficcones



Category: Broadchurch
Genre: F/M, Friends to Lovers, Post-Season/Series 03, long-overdue conversations, no mentions of case
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-01
Updated: 2017-11-01
Packaged: 2019-01-27 16:48:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12586308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueboxesandtrafficcones/pseuds/blueboxesandtrafficcones
Summary: After Hardy shoots down her invitation for drinks, Miller needs to know where they stand.Hardy decides to tell her.





	Things That Need Saying

He’s not really surprised when the knock comes just after midnight.

On the other side of the glass, Miller stands with her arms folded, a furious look on her face.  As soon as he slid the door open, she started talking.

“You know, sometimes I really don’t get you.  Just when I think I do, you go off in a completely different direction!  Do you enjoy being alone, and miserable, and contrary? What is wrong with you?!”

He merely sighed, stepping outside and closing the door behind him, hoping she wouldn’t wake Daisy.

“What are you talking about?”

“You!  And just, who you’ve been since you came back.”

He crossed his arms, mirroring her position.

“Miller, when I was first here, I was about five and a half feet below rock bottom.  I’m in a better place now.  I’m not sure what you’re looking for.”  He patiently explained to her.

She spluttered for a moment. “I just want to know where we stand.” She finally managed.  “Are we partners?  Friends?  Colleagues, acquaintances?”

“What do you want me to say?”  His calm demeanor only served to rile her up further.

“The truth!  Are we friends?”  She shouted at him.

“Yes, we’re friends. And while technically I’m your boss, I do consider you my partner.  Is that all?”

“No, that’s not bloody all! You say we’re friends, but are we? Really?”  She doesn’t like how desperate her tone has gotten, but the bit of liquid courage she had before deciding to come over won’t let her hide it.

“Because, it doesn’t seem like it.  You don’t treat me like I’m your friend.”  She accused him.  His eyebrows raised in response.

“What are you talking about? Miller, I confide in you about Daisy, I ask your advice and sometimes even take it.  What more do you want from me?”

“All right, that’s nice, you act like I’m your friend, but what about me?  You certainly don’t seem to bother being one to me.”  She started getting frustrated, partially because of the conversation, but also because she could feel tears welling and  _damn it, she will not cry over this._

“How do you mean?” His tone had shifted now, and he could feel the anger building.

“You don’t ask!  Not about the boys, about how I am – three days ago, I’m crying on the steps and all I needed was a hug, and all you can do is say  _‘Not all men’_ , as if that’s any bloody use!”  She yelled.

“Are you kidding me?”  He stared at her, incredulous, chest heaving.

She only glared right back at him, standing by her accusation.

“For God’s sake Miller – are you serious right now?  Every time,  _every single time_ , I offered you any sort of decency, or kindness, or caring, or quite frankly friendship, you all but spit in my hand!  You made it more than perfectly clear you didn’t want any of that from me, so I come back, try to respect your boundaries, and it still ends with you shouting at me!  You’re asking what I want, Miller, what the hell do  _you_  want?!”  He finally lost it, letting out his frustrations.  She’s shocked into silence, but only momentarily.

“I- I never-” She stammered ineffectually.  “When did I do any of that?”  She finally got out.

“During Danny’s case, during the trial and investigating Sandbrook.”  He told her quietly.  She went to deny it, but then realized he was right – she thought about all the times she had refused a hug from him, shouted at him, ignored his admittedly clumsy attempts at comfort.  The guilt threatened to overwhelm her, and she slowly sank into the deck chair nearby.

“You’re right.  I’m sorry.”  She whispered, looking up at him.  “That was an unbelievably awful time for me – first, the awful murder and the investigation, and then my spouse, the one person I loved, I  _trusted_ , more than anyone, betrayed me.  I couldn’t– I couldn’t- I’m  _sorry_.”

The tears had begun falling, and at seeing them Hardy sighed and sank down on the chair next to her.

“I know.”  The words sounded trite, but when she remembered Sandbrook, what Tess had done, she realized he really did know, which just made her cry harder.  She sensed him raise his arm, pause, and then slowly lower it.  

Deciding that if things were to change, it would obviously have to come from her, she purposely leaned into his side, resting her head on his shoulder.  Tentatively, he raised his arm again, wrapping it around her, pulling her slightly closer.

They sat there together for what seemed like ages, Miller sniffling into his shoulder as he gently ran his fingers through her hair.  Eventually, she sat up, dug a tissue from her pocket, and blew her nose.

“Do you think – I mean, can we maybe start over?”  She asked, blinking up at him.

“Start over?”  There was a catch in his voice, and a strange look in his eye.

“Yes.  As friends, I mean.  Sort of, re-set the settings, so to speak?”  He stared at her for so long, she started to worry.  When she worried, she babbled.  “If, I mean, friendship is still something you want.  It may not be.  And that’s okay, really.  I understand. I suppose I was awful to you, back then. Not sure I’d forgive me, if I was you.”

He looked away, staring down at his hands in front of him, silent.  Her heart fell.

“Look, Hardy, just, be honest with me, yeah?  We’ve been through so much together…  Do you want to be friends?”

He didn’t look up.

“Honestly?”

“Total, complete, absolute, no-matter-how-painful honesty.  I promise, I will respect whatever you say, and won’t let things be awkward at work or anything.”  Her heart beat almost painfully, waiting for his response.

He sighed, glanced up at her, then ran his hands over his face and through his hair.

“Fine.  Just… promise me this, yeah?  Don’t laugh, and if it’s not the same for you, just… tell me you’ll forget all about it yeah?”

She nodded vigorously, waiting with bated breath.

“No.  No, I don’t want friendship from you.”  She felt as though she’d been slapped, but managed to hold it together as he turned sad, lonely eyes on her.

“The truth is, Miller, I want more.  I want so much more.”

The shoe dropped, and her head spun.  Surely he wasn’t implying what she thought he was…

“You mean – romantically?” She can’t believe the words, but the look in his eye confirmed her guess.

“Yeah.”  He let out a deep breath, as though he’d been holding it for years.  Maybe he had.

“Oh my God.”  She muttered, leaning forward, resting her hands in her head.  “Oh, my,  _God_.”

“Yeah.”  Hardy repeated dryly.

“So, just to be clear, are you saying you’re in lo-”

“Yes.”  He cut her off before she could finish the word.  “Yeah, I am.  Have been for ages.”

“Right.”  She looked out toward the water, trying to process, even though she felt as though the world had shifted ninety degrees.

“Listen, Miller, like I said, we can just forget it, yeah?  Move on, let it go, never speak of it again?  I’m sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable, but you did say total honesty…” He trailed off, watching her watch the surf.

She stood suddenly. “Um, I have to – I’ll be back.” She promised, heading higher on the cliff.  “I just need to think – I’ll be back soon.”  She left him there on his patio, almost running up the path.

-

Ten minutes later he’s reclined on the deck chair, staring at the stars.  She’s been gone long enough that he’s begun to consider different towns he could move Daisy too – hopefully not too far, as he doesn’t want her to lose her friendship with Chloe, but far enough he never has to see Miller again.   _At least she didn’t laugh_ , he thought glumly.

He suddenly sensed another presence, and seeing Miller had returned, he hastily rose.  Stood before her, he promised himself he would accept whatever she decided, even if it involved him packing up Daisy and leaving town this very night.

He didn’t say anything, and couldn’t even bring himself to meet her eyes, merely staring past her towards the bloody ocean he so hated.

When the waiting got to be too much, he looked down at her, and saw tears in her eyes as she bit her lip

Finally, she spoke.

“I have to admit, I never actually considered this – I thought I mostly annoyed you.  I’m not sure how to feel about, well, about how  _you_  feel.”

He nodded in acceptance, though he half wished she would just shoot him down now (or just plain shoot him) and get it over with, rather than giving him false hope.

“I think I just need time.” She finished.

“Right.  Sounds fair enough.”  He told her, even managing a weak smile.

“Good.  Though, um, you’re welcome to try to sway me.”  She smiled shyly, tucking a bit of hair behind her ear.

“What?”

“Well, you’ve obviously been thinking about this for a while.  It would only be fair if you shared your thoughts with me, how this happened,  _when_  this happened.”

Still confused, he nodded again, opening his mouth to explain all when she held up a hand.

“Not now, but maybe one night this week?  Over dinner, perhaps?”  The smile shifted to a cheeky grin as he understood.

“Miller, are you asking me on a date?”  He rumbled, eyes twinkling.

“Oh, no.”  She quickly denied.  “I’m just saying, if you invited me out, wanted to share your thoughts and all, I’d probably say yes.”

With a start, he realized she was flirting with him.

“Probably?”  He shifted a little closer to her, voice lowering.

“Mmhmm.  Providing I’m not working, of course.”  She teased him.

“Boss is a bit of a hard ass, huh?”  He was well within her personal space now, and rather than minding, she found she liked it.  Where Joe had only been just taller than her, Hardy towered over her; rather than feeling trapped, she felt safe.

She rested her hand over his heart and gave him a coy smile.  “Hard to say – he’s not even asked me out, I’ve certainly never had an opportunity to feel it.”  His eyes widened in surprise as she quickly backed away.

“I’ve got to get home. If you ever decide to make a move, let me know – I’ll clear my calendar.”  With a final flirty smile, she almost skipped down the path to her car, humming to herself.

It’s not what she expected, but as she paused to look back to see him still watching her, she thought it might be just what she needed instead.

_God will put you in the right place.  Even if you don’t know it at the time._


End file.
